ShutMeUp

I am an SRK fan

2010-02-04T12:14:00.002+05:30

I didn't like him that much for simple reasons of individual's preferences when is comes to which actors you like to watch and enjoy the movies of. But with his viewpoint regarding india's (of the mass ) stand/opinion on IPL-Pakistan-Cricketers-treatment and then his stand against Shiv Sena, I fully support him and I really appreciate his gesture when he could have simply apologized and ensure his movie does well and make lots of money for him. I hope people will get inspired as many people have similar feelings but theirs' don't count but his does.
Somebody needs to do something about Maharashtra. If the majority like Shiv Sena stand, state ONLY for locals, I think they are asking for a federal state, some new article like 356 for Maharashtra needs to be made. Let it be then made public and lets see if Maharashtra can thrive with isolation from India.

limit of human apathy

2010-01-10T14:22:00.002+05:30

Since last 24 hours, the image of an indian police officer is swirling around in my head. Though the image as telecasted on the tv was a blur, it can be imagined what must have been the expression and what thoughts must have been going through his mind. I must confess, this one has been the WORST image of India I ever got.
The same camera when panned sideways, showed so many people, a fleet of cars - all came to halt there but just to watch the man dying!!!!!!!
We say we are so sensitive to people's emotion. Where was all that when all one needed was initiative to help him. With the fleet of cars around, had even a single man tried to help him, nobody could have denied yielding (I wont use 'offering') his vehicle for help. But no, the politicians/beurocrats and their men were busy watching and camerman was busy filming.
Not a single person present there should ever in their life blame police or any other civilian for not helping him/her when need arises. I am sure their guilt feeling would haunt them throughout their life.
My concept in God is only on basis of the uncertainties which are beyond our control.
But for the rest, if I make a mistake, my guilt has haunted me enough that I try my best to keep far from mistakes. But the problem is what do you do to a inhuman, in form of human being, who has no mind/feelings of his own, and has learnt that keep committing mistakes and goto a temple and the supreme power will wipe off all your sins.
Seems the concept of God/religious-books/religion telling us the moral principles and code of conduct is not working. Atleast the portion of getting rid of your sins should be removed. I simply wish if you make mistakes, one should be taught to live with them all their life. Let them be known there is no way out, as there isn't any.

Expectations

2009-06-30T02:10:00.008+05:30

'Rules are for the guidance of wise men and the obedience of fools'
Douglas Bader (google the name to know about this legend)
So are the popular quotations from holy scriptures or great men.
Its said, 'neki kar aur dariya mein daal'. I'll rather say 'jo-man-aaye-so-kar and dariya mein daal'. Since you already use the word 'neki' the whole essence of the quote is already lost. So, if you use it with the word 'neki' in mind, rather don't do it.
But what happens is that when you do it, you do it with love as you think the people you do it for, appreciate it and will remember it. (Just a extrapolation of the expectations of it is that ,in return, you desire, they will also start loving you in the same way you love them). And, its very understandable to expect reciprocation. Even a mother won't keep loving her child the way she does if she is never able to see the effervescent smile of a baby(can anybody check out this psychological experiment!!!!)
But, it does hurt a lot if that reciprocation is not received. (In my postings, long back, I wrote that whate'er happens to you, its because of you, nobody else). So, how do you save yourself from this very general problem.
Simply, stop 'neki kar and dariya mein daal' and simply do whate'er pleases you.
As I already emphasized Douglas Bader's quote, 'following your desires' is for those 'intelligent' people (who are not going to follow those desires which can destroy them). So, if it pleases to help somebody, help him/her but if it doesn't please you, simply don't do it. If it pleases you to love somebody, do it.
But then, who doesn't want to be loved by those whom you love. Then what do you do. With the realisation that it was all your desire to love those people whom you did, you won't feel (that) bad if its not reciprocated. Sounds inhuman. Maybe, but somehow God is there to keep the humanity preserved. He (almost) make sure, sometime or other, few people do come into your life who are able to penetrate your 'cold' heart and generate in you, a strong desire to be loved by them and most importantly, they also love you!!!!

What type of person you are

2009-06-21T17:49:00.004+05:30

While chopping capsicum, for the filling inside improvised-samosa, a sudden thought flashed by my mind.
How can one best identify the type of person one is. Is it by the way he acts or is it by the way he 'reacts'?
Or maybe both of the things are equally important hallmarks of a person.
But, atleast at the moment of chopping capsicum, I felt its the later. How you react to a particular situation shows those aspects of yourself to you which you might not even have been aware of, yourself.
The way we solve linear equations - If there are constraints, unique solutions exist else there are innumerable solutions. Similarly, when constrained by the situations you fall in, your real traits manifest themselves than when acting with free will.
Now, after Socrates (not the brazilian football player), I think I am doing good at proving things with logics/analogies.

What bias is this. Surely not gender bias!!!!!

2009-04-28T11:08:00.000+05:30

I don't know what prompted my neurons to suddenly get connected in the way that led me to the recollection of our TA202 class in the year 1999 in my college.
Anyway, poor neurons, though they never grow in number since the time human being is born, but they play the most important role just by their "connections" and reconnections (connections are really important, you see!!)
We were around 200 students (EE, CSE and few other branches combined) attending the most boring class I have ever attended in my life - TA202. (As I said, all I remember about the class is that it used to be conducted in LH2 (second largest lecture hall)). Almost all the people used to get bored in the class but none dare bunk it because the instructor (May his soul rest in peace) had made the attendance mandatory and he was notorious for no mercy to defaulters (he had a history of it.historysheeter :-))
Not only that, he used to get the back-door locked exactly at 8:00 am in the morning. Only the front door used to remain open, from which nobody could enter without the instructor watching him/her.
So, as was the custom, as soon as the 8:00 bell rang, the guys sitting nearest to the doors (I wonder what the motivation might have been, for sitting there, except the sadist pleasure in watching few people missing the class and hence their attendence by whiskers!!!) moved from their positions to close the doors. Just then appeared a girl from MME department on the left door, to attend the class. The instructor saw her. She started apologising for the same but the instructor didn't want(probably) to set wrong precedent. She was not allowed in and the side doors were closed.
5 minutes, mind u, its 300 seconds!!!!!!, later appears the sex-bomb of our batch, to attend the class. Obviously, her appearance was noticed only because she appeared on the FRONT DOOR!!!!!!!
The dilemma on the instructor's face was evident (had there been any lady instructor, i wonder if she would have been in a dilemma. I guess not). I am surprised how can I forget her name, but anyway, the girl waves her hand in some strange way, I guess some typical style to bowl over people like him, and says that her cycle broke down. The whole class was howling/shrieking/../.. but that didn't affect the instructor an iota. He was totally bowled over already and lets in the sex-bomb to the class!!!!!!!
She was not that thankless afterall and she came and sat at one of the emplty seats on the FRONT bench. le lo buddhe tum bhi nayansukh!!!!!!!!!

Satyadeo ka naashta kisne churaaya

2009-04-26T11:01:00.000+05:30

Scene1:
time: 16:40 hours (on someday of the year 1995)
Room number 1, Prem Aashram, Netarhat School, Ranchi, Bihar, India
(From next scenes, all other parts of address would remain the same so only the rooms would be mentioned)
Faira (Sorry, I can't recollect the parent-given-name of this 3-yrs-junior-to-me guy as the senior-given-name is too sacred to be forgotten) enters with a tray full of "SHAKARPAARE". He puts some barely perceptible amount of the sweet snacks on the 3 cupboards on the 3 corners of the room. Then he moves to the 4th corner which is evidently entirely different from the other corners. There is a big almirah, two cupboards entirely surrounding the bed, and a table with stuffs like a pen, nice looking table-watch, hair-cream etc., all seized from juniors. Well, this is the DEN of the most dreadfully-respected seniormost, Satyadeo-ji. He is not to be seen (Its "swadhyaay" time and not a soul is supposed to be anywhere else but at his bed, reading. Of course the guy who has to serve the evening-snacks is an exception as the school's tight routine only gives you 15mts between the time swadyaay ends and the time you are supposed to be at the gound for evening games). Well, Faira knows (EVERYBODY knows, for that matter) what to do. He fishes out as much of shakkarpaara as his smalls fists can manage, from the tray, puts it into satyadeo ji's marked bowl for snacks, which is too capitalist for the socialist principles of school. He repeats the ritual as the bowl is still too empty to avoid Satyadeo ji's wrath if its left like that. He is still not satisfied. Finally he empties almost 20% of the shakkarpaara on 1 person's bowl while there are 20 people to be given the snacks. Doesn't matter. Is that respect/care/../..??? Yes, its all those feelings which made him do so. But how did it all arise? Simply because of FEAR. Not a soul dare invite Satyadeo ji's wrath.

Scene2:
time: 18:35 hrs
Room number 2.
Anand, one of the 4 guys who are not scared of Satyadeo ji as they are from the same "seniormost" batch, and Satyadeo are having a deep discussion on how could the impossible occurance of Satyadeo's share of snacks got stolen, happen!!!! These two make wonderful friends (they still do) and now its a BIG thing that has happened and so they have got to do something about it. Anyway, Anand shares his if-not-20%-of-the-total-share-but-still-more-than-15% shakkarpaare with Satyadeo. Suddenly, in midst of the discussion, Satyadeo shouts "SITTU, IDHAR SUN BE. POORE HOUSE MIEN JISKE JISKE PAAS SHAKKARPAARA BACHA HUA HAI, LEKAR AA. ZALDI. BHAAG."
Anyway, aftersometime, the whole house is asked to come to Room Number 2. To Anand ji's room. He is the prefect afterall. Its Swadhaayay time again but School rules were written by few old people who succumbed to mortality long back, while senior's wishes/orders/whims are immortal. So, the whole bunch of 16 juniors appear in the room. All standing.
Satyadeo asks, just to make sure, James, Surd and Bhadar, if they took it. Being fellow batchmates, there are otherways of dealing with them, not the same way as you deal with juniiors doing such acts. After repated asking, its assumed they didn't do this. Then Satyadeo asks the juniors, does anybody wish to confess. Obvious answer. Its anybody's guess what would happen if anybody confesses.
Well, the the whole house (guys ranging form class VII to class X, aged between 12 and 17 yrs) is warned that now there are some nice expletives for the person who stole the shakkarpaaras and since nobody accepts stealing it, so lets enjoy the expletives to be bestowed on the person who stole it.
Everybody HAS to agree. Satyadeo again asks the three fellow batchmates. Its agreed upon to go ahead with the proceedings.
Mind you, its the age when some are aware of human-physiology and the terms associated with it and the popular terms for them, some are not at all aware and some might be more gyaani. But one thing is sure, none are so matured to not take the expletives of those kinds, personally, if its directed at them. So, begins the torrent of the most innovative expletives the audience of 19 ever witnessed. Starting from the "origin", (wherefrom the human lifeform originates), the expletives keep getting more and more innovative. Anand is roaring with laughter and so is Surd. Surprisingly James is quiet and Bhadar is too serious to be affected by all this as his mind is probably elsewhere (he must be thinking about the window-pane of the bio-lab he broke the other night to take out the skeleton to be hung on the school-main-building, which is a ritual of few chosen ones of every batch, to show the "machopana" of the batch. This was the batch of 1996 afterall). Juniors dare not laugh as its against the protocol to laugh, in front of seniors. They try hard to control the laughter. Anyway, the expletives, after exploring the body parts of the near and dear ones of the "thief", moves to one level higher to those parts being used used by other life forms like pigs as shitpots and the level just keep getting higher and expletives almost taking form of poetry. What a remarkable show it was. The show goes on for 40 minutes and then everybody is sent back to their respective rooms for swadhyaay.

Pranay tussi great ho

2008-09-28T00:57:00.000+05:30

It was the first day (some day in Feb, 1996) of our Board (Xth) exams. I was standing alone waiting for the exam to start. Nobody was allowed to talk to me as the batch (of 100) had decided to boycott me. To top up my plight, this was my first ever public exam. I was wathcing my friends talking/discussing/fighting/.. till somebody shouted my name and I saw Pranay waving his hand, saying Hi to me!!!!!!
That too in front of whole of the batch. I was extremely happy and I knew he is the only person in the batch who could do this. In fact, the reason of his doing this was simply that here was a guy whom the majority was against. Then, what better chance to show his anti-establishment views, which he had (I'll say still has) ardent faith in. Only he could dare do this (he didn't have to dare, for him its natural), nobody else in the batch could. (I remember on few occasstions bumping into Onkar, Rajeev, Santosh or few more, of course one at a time, and they confiding in me that they don't want to boycott me but they hope I did understand what the batch-pressure was like). Pranay and I were never mates enough to pass my judgement if we were good or bad mates. But that day, his gesture made my day. Surprisingly, my exams didn't take a hit (atleast results said so, I can't say in absolute sense) by this month-long boycott by my batchmates.
(Let me tell the reason as people may take me or others in wrong opinion if reason is not stated, for the boycott:
As every year, some mischievous guys did some mischief and then they got identified. School-admin decided, as everytime, to give them some punishment. Few genius in the batch came up with a idea that they can punish few, not all. (George Orwell's "Animal Farm" in practice!!!!) The masses didn't have much clue. "Everybody" was just told to do what "everybody" was doing which was actually being decided by "Few". Masses complied. I happenned to be aware (I was not inside) of the core-team's decision. I said, its stupid idea, but since I was almost a non-entity, nobody cared. All I could do was telling them that I wont join them. Nobody took it seriously till I really defied!!!!!! They all suddenly vanished from school, in the wee-hours, with me left for grilling by teachers asking where did the 100 students vanished!!!!! 4 years of training - I clearly expressed my ignorance about all my friends, where they were and all, and techers didn't pressurize me enough, as they might have foreseen my situation and they didn't want to add to my sorry situation. Well, for me, it was not a matter of anti-establishment or any such thing. Simple thing was I was the first guy in my school to clear Math Olympiad (still in Xth) and I didn't want to loose the next-level opportunity for some reasons I could not justify. Anyway, whatever my reason, the boycott was imminent and I wont say, totally unjustified.)
Anyway, where was our esteemed friend Pranay then. FYI, he was rusticated from school till the board exams, as punishment (ek reason ho tab to likhoon!!!!)
If I have ever seen a guy totally unafraid of society, its him. Sometimes he seem to be unaware of its presence.
This reminds me of a very interesting story of his.
Of course, its natural for parents to be worried about such a kid. His mom somehow convinced him to take him to some REAL famous jyotisi. New challenge, Pranay complied. There the jyotisi ji thought of first building some relation as well as asserting some of his prowess. So he asked Pranay if he wanted "Agra ka petha" or "Kolkata ka Rosogolla" (he used to produce things like this outof thin air!!!!). I have spent sometime with him and I can easily imagine the glint in his eyes that must have had appeared. He, jumping with joy, asked "humein to Asansol ki sonpapadi chahiye"!!!!! Just imagine his mom's condition!!!!! but he does this as he just doesn't give a damn about all this craps. If you wanna assert your authority, act and prove it, don't pretend. If the jyotisiji had the power, he should not feel offended by someguy really challenging it.
I really sometimes wish, I could pick some such traits of his. Almost total fearlessness. He might fear some goons' thrashing (that too his threshold is way higher than we mortals can imagine) but he has no fear of future, society, nothing. What I have learned is that its difficult to imbibe this fearlessness once you are gorwn up. I have seen him since we were 12 years of age. He has always been like this. I think he is a child who have really been groomed with fearlessness instilled in him. (But then why is his one-year younger brother, just like me and all, I cann't comprehend). I agree, it so extremely difficult to handle him. In fact there are only 4-5 people left in the batch whom he doesn't find irritating and doesn't mind talking to. But how good things could be if every child grows with no concept of fear of people/society/../... as long as they know don't cross into others' domain, whats better. Yes, the majority in the society don't like such people. Around 80% of my batch avoid Pranay for simple reason that he is so straight-forward that it becomes insulting to you sometimes. (I agree that if he gets mean, since he has not much idea of protocols, he would straight-forwardly insult you!!!! But then thats what he meant to do, so why pretending!!!!
But, still, courtsey, protocols etc. etc. are much easier to learn, but truth, honesty, fearlessness etc. are some virtues we should try to groom in kids more. Rest they can decide if they wanna pick or not.

october of 1997

2008-09-20T03:25:00.000+05:30

All of a sudden, memory of a quite-funny-now-but-just-the-opposite-back-then episode, passed by my thoughts.
On one of the october evenings of 1997, during the regular evening power-cuts, me, Jawahar and two more batchmates of Intermediate-Science, 2nd year, were seated on the floor of my room, making attempts to study in the light of the lantern, but actually trying to decide whose food was less worse - bholaji's or ramnareshji's (they were the proprieters of the two food-messes of our hostel). It was a nice evening, with usual bulla sessions on full swing with no time-wastage-guilt-feeling as we had so many books lying all around us on the floor(!!!!), until two guys appeared at the door asking "Anand Gaurav kaun hai?".
The manner of asking was much too gentle to suit their appearances (its not in hindsight, but even then I could notice that) but anyway, I being the only Anand Gaurav in that room, thought of satisfying their curiosity, Though, I was not stranger to strange guys knocking at my room for some reasons or other (justified ones though), this one did make me uneasy.
When you have been studying in a college like mine, Patna Science College , which is surrounded by great(!!!!) academic institutions (where frequecnt police raids are much less commonplace than much worse regular occurrences) you get too familiar with the faces like those two which had appeared at my hostelroom-doorstep that night. The faces that makes people like me try their best to avoid. But of course you can't show you are scared so you do face them if it comes to it and face them with full confidence (your surviving-instincts is already working hard to bail you out meanwhile).
Suddenly another episode, about few months back, flashed by me. It was when a guy in white starched kurta-payjama barged in our room (we used to be 4 people in one room during that time in ISc 1st year) and sat on one guy's bed resuting which the two guys of that side of the room got up. He started talking nonsense to them with uncouth-confidence oozing out of him. Since I was getting disturbed, I started commenting loudly about useless people disturbing sincere students and kept increasing my voice till he BARKED!!!!!!!I still remember, it sent shivers through my spine. The reason is again the academic institutions which surrounded my hostel. He called me and I complied (my survival instincts asked me to do so!!). But thankfully the 'uncleji'-type-student-neta-ji gave me a BIG scolding and left me and left the room as well!!!!!
But that guy was afterall much worse in looks and appearance than these two and these two were of my age. So, it seemed all safe. They very gently formally asked me to come out for a walk till the hostel-gate while we talked. Seeing no harm, I joined. No sooner had I crossed the hostel-gate, one guy started hitting me from the back side while other held my arms.
I was TOTALLY dumbfounded!!!!!!! Who the hell wont be?????
Thanks to Jawahar's survival instints which was more customsied to Patna than mine. He sensed something fishy and started collecting few students while following me to the hostel-gate. The funny part begins here!!!!!
There got around 20-odd students gathered at the hostel-gate watching me being beaten, that too by just two guys!!!!! But thankfully, that gathering attracted the attention of Ramnareshji (the mess-owner-cum-cook-cum-cleaner-..-..) who came to the gate, gave a loud verbal thrashing to the two guys and surprisingly they left me and 'walked' off!!!!!
I still remember vividly that night. It was a big big jolt to me. Not only me and my batchmates, even the BSc seniors found it difficult to believe that I might have given somebody reason strong enough to do this. Anyway, I sometimes feel happy about this, in hindsight,that I got the experience that when you get beaten, physical pain is not that big an issue. Its other things, the scare, humiliation,feeling-of-helplessness, weakness, that eats you more.
Two days after the episode, Tinku bhaiya (son of an uncle of mine with whose family, I stayed for 2 months when I first moved to Patna and had yet to get hostel-acco) came to my room, for the first time (I frequented his place to get some nice home-food and nice time chatting with aunty and badi and chhoti di and bhaiya so there was no need of him to come to my place to meet me). He informed that a very close friend of his told him about my thrashing (and he added that the thing I got beaten with was a revolver-butt!!!! As if I was not scared enough!!!) and had asked him to ask me to keep a low profile!!!!!!
What the heck!!!!! No warning, nothing and you thrash a guy and then tell him the reason he cant comprehend!!!!! Anyway, I thought it better to leave the episode aside as it was not comprehensible and I also knew that is was way better than Pranay, a schoolmate of mine, in the same college but in another hostel, who got beaten almost every week (But everybody agreed that he gave lots of reasons to the local goons to do that. You can imagine the type of guy he was, by the fact that he quit IITKgp after two years over there just coz he didn't feel like it. (Went to Caltech for summers, stayed back for the full semester, came back, had altercation with his profs and quit Kgp!!!!)
Thanks to my many friends who gave me emotional support back then. I remember Sharad offering to get those two identified through some friends of his and then get them beaten. But then when I thanked him for the offer and expressed no desire for any such thing, the relief on his face was evident :-).
Now in hindsight, I find the episode so funny. Not an iota of remorse about it. Maybe strange, but thats the way some experiences are like. The moment they happen to you, they mean a lot to you but, once they pass and you move on, they seem to be so insignificant, you get surprised how could it ever affect you.

Thickness of a book: Should it not be proportional to the idea beng conveyed

2008-08-28T10:26:00.000+05:30

Sounds absurd what do I mean by the title.
Well, title maybe totally uncorrelated to what I intend to write.
Anyway, presently I am reading a book called "Blink" by Ian Galdwell. Its a good book.
I really like the entirely new concept the author exposes his thoughts/logic about.
What I don't like about the book is that it puts LOT many small examples to convey what it wants to prove. I am not sure if its required. But if he doesn't do that, maybe the book wont be even quarter as thick as its now. Result, maybe we are done with reading it in 1/6th of time than now. (I agree it also depends on the target audience, majority of which needs lots of illustrations to get the message across. I myself am one though, sometimes)
The thing is that we retain the idea/messege/influence as long (or a bit longer) as the person's-work or person's-reminiscence or the person himself/herself is around us and we are able to interact with it/him/her. ("Out of sight, out of mind" types). I think I would have been a much greater fan of Gandhi ( I am already a BIG one) had I met/talked to him once than by reading so much about him. Thats what personal touch does to you. It just bowls you over. But but but, you can let your mind controlled by it if you so wish and can do the contrary as well (We are gifted with a strong mind with which we can control or drift, at will)
Same with books, unless they are in sync with the idea/concept somewhere inside you or unless they are really revolutionary. If you already have that concept, the book's effect lasts long(er) as it reinforces the thinking you aleady beleive in. If its really revolutionary (rarely books are so. There are people who can do this to you more effectively, than books), you accept the idea since it appealed to you and hence the effect last, if you put efforts to that.
But for other books which don't fall in any of these two categories, the influence lasts as long as the book takes to be finshed (or a bit more). Maybe that way it makes sense to keep the book thicker. You read "blink" and then later on if I come-up with a book called "Deliberations", written with equally strong intent of proving higher-importance of deliberation to spontaniety in decision-making, you may realise that you are now attracted towards that book.
ANYthing NEW/DIFFERENT appeals to us. But they are not lasting. They are a welcome change like innumerable revolutions which the masses later realised, were equally worse as the earlier regime. Same way, since this spontaniety-funda is new to us, we like the book. We MUST be open to new idea, but should not get carried away just becuase its different/new. Our inner-self definitely deserves more respect than this.

A nice hindi poem

2008-08-24T03:11:00.000+05:30

faith in God brings the virtue called patience

2008-08-23T18:52:00.000+05:30

While walking back from the bus-stop to home, after attending an all-Deutsche full-day 'kurz', I was thinking about wat else but patience.
As with many ideas, this one also struck me out of the blue.
"Faith in God teaches you patience"
(BTW, this reminds how so many times, by thinking for few minutes in quietness in restroom, I have solved my many circuit-design-problems than hours of brainstorming in front of my workstation !!!!!!)
When you don't have faith in God, you unintentionally, try to surpass your circle of influence. This is obvious since you beleive that everything that happens to you is because of you and hence everything that you want to happen to you, has to be done by you. As a result, like anybody else, you start working on any priority thing.
Let me try to be patient and explain it to you.
When there appears a wound, you try to heal it using some medication you are aware of. If it fails, you try few more times before finally visiting a doctor. Now once you are at a doctor's place, you have to patiently wait for your turn/time when doc's attention is bestowed upon you. You wait not because you are patient (you already tried curing it, remember? ) but because you are helpless and have no choice.
(I am just trying to convey my point, no offences meant to any pool of thought).
Similarly, if you have faith in God, you have the advantage that you don't try to cross your circle of influence (in fact, sometimes you don't even fully exercise it for fear of outstepping) and wait for things to happen (fact remains that God doesn't do anything but the infinite events occur which, with present tools/machines/knowledge, we can't model accurately) - some person responding, some boss coming and talking to you for your benefit etc. etc. - and it generally works out. It works out, not in the truest sense, but because you already had accepted whate'er the outcome of infinite events are ('Generation/Organisation/Destruction = GOD).
Well, to be back on track and to remain true to my title of the article, how does this still prove patience-thing.
Well, for that, I again go back to the doctor-visit analogy. Similarly, for things which you think require your immediate attention, and you think it to be under your control, you don't wait to solve, howe'er patient person you are (since it has nothing to do with patience) but start solving it. And since you are mistaken with the thought that things are under your control, you immediately act.
Result(s):
You sometimes put some people into uncomfortable situation by overstepping into their zone and they are too nice to immediately react (remember, they are patient people and they react only once they are sure you don't realize you are making a mistake and hence you may not stop unless and until told so, in clear terms). It has its own advantage ("kichar mein se kamal nikalna", i m able to find some advantage!!!!!). You force people, not with any such intent, to come clear and you don't have to work hard on deductions based on social-norms, beahvioral-patterns etc. etc.

(Got to goto some dinner now. If something to be added is felt, I'll do so later else please consider this as the end of the article)

Is it only me!!!!!!

2008-08-19T11:43:00.000+05:30

I have lost count of how many people suggested me to be patient. The people whom I have lots of repect for and trust on.
Well, some people think this is beacuse I act and THEN think and then act again to compensate for it. I have tried and analysed myself on it, quite a lot.
(Well, if you have read engineering, underdamped systems are unstable, overdamped are very slow and critically damped are the best choice (with some risk of instability). Same with patience/impulsiveness. If you are very patient, you act quite slowly, though mostly correct. If you are very impulsive, you act fast with the repurcussions associated with it and in status in-between, you trade-off some risk with time)
Actualy, the contrary is true. I think a LOT. I am not talking about it in positive/negative sense. For every action I am going to take, my mind has already thought N possible options about it from the viewpoint of how it may affect me, how it may affect the person it concerns and is this really what I wanna convey and many more such things . But since the other concerned person is guided by so many rules and learnings-of-their-own-which-I-have-no-inkling-about and their-own-value-systems etc. etc., I can never satisfy myself if a particular action is the right one.
Result, it has almost become my habit to act the way I think is correct. But the problem is my mind is STILL thinking. The thing is that it is now thinking with the extra enlightenment of the occurrence of the action-taken. So, the more the information you have, the higher the probability of correct decision you make. So, then I try to correct thing by reacting, which, not unjustifiably, is interpreted as compensation for something. My forgetfulness also adds to my sorry situation (perceived so by others).
But still, the most important reason why I fail (very often I do) in striking it right, the first time (or even the 2nd/3rd/4th/../..th time), is that I have yet to grow up to understanind how majority of human-minds think. I am pretty bad at it and I am surprised how almost 90% of the people are good at it. This is possibly due to my way-of-thinking being different from the majority and also my reluctance to change it (it needs some self-convincing afterall)
Anyway, somehow I have survived and survived with 100s of really great friends. So, maybe my hastiness/impulsiveness scares the short-time-acquaintainces (hope this improves sometime soon) but they themselves in the long-run, generally don't mind putting up with it with the hope that yours truly, someday, would learn and overcome this weakness.
He indeed does hope/wish/try to be/do so.

I love the festival fo Rakhi: As long as I am away from home

2008-08-08T11:01:00.000+05:30

I remember, very clearly, the tension I used to have one day before Rakshabandhan.
Before I go into details, let me add that "Rakshabandhan", like innumerable indian festivals, has got a theme and the one associated with this festival is that of the relation between brother and sister. Brother is supposed to take care of his sister, protect her from Allauddin-Khilji-types-road-side-romeos or sometimes even from Rana-Rattan-Singh-types-boy-friends of his sister (even if, very probably, she may not like it that way)
Anyway, the reasons I used to get tense on the previous evening of rakshhabandhan had nothing to do with protecting my sisters - the days,when I used to get tense during the pre-rakhi(popular name for the festival "Rakshhabandhan" ) days, my sisters used to protect me from my "friends" (girl or boys, whatsoever) (it could not continue long since I moved to hostel pretty soon) -. The reason was just associated with yours truly.
Well,rakhi started with the theme of brother committing to protecting his sister, but gradually, as with everything, people realised that protection/security can also be sold/purchased as a commodity, the thing "protection" got converted to "money" for the convinience of all. When did this transformation take place, I have no idea, but I have seen it that way since the first day I remember about it. In rakhi, sisters tie a band to the brother and the brother gives her some money. Whatever the amount of money was, it always seemed HUGE to me (even if it was some money which my mom gave to me to be passed on to my sisters, once they had tied the band). This feeling of money being big-amount came probably because I was too dumb a kid back then who used to give all his financial gifts ( you get it when you meet your elder relatives like your grandma or uncles and aunts) to mom and my sisters used to keep it with them and hence any more money they got during rakhi, made me relatively poorer.
Not just the financial drain that I can avoid once I am far from my sisters, makes me like the rakhi-from-distance, but there is another much more significant advantage I gained out of being farther from home-town during the festival of rakhi.
I am so happy that I dont have to worry anymore about a particular nice-beautiful-charming-sweet-..-.. girl from my neighbourhood tying me rakhi!!!!! (remember the theme of rakhi)
When you are a kid, your emotions regarding the opposite sex is just not given any respect. Its treated with so much insensitivity, I am surprised. Anyway, what happens is that if you happen to have some girl around who is not your sister, but she is around at the time when the band (btw, the band is also called "rakhi", same name as the festival) is being tied to ur wrist, that girl would also be asked, in 'courtsey', to tie one rakhi to you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its such a dilemmatic situation, one needs to think sometime to come up with some diplomatic answer to accept or to deny this offer of tying a band symbolising sister-brother relation between the two !!!!
Well, many guys dont mind spending money on a beautiful girl, but not this way, for sure. You give her the money for tying the rakhi on ur wrist and also, u accept her as your sister!!!!!!!!!!
So, its anybody's guess now, why all the worries and tension.

PS: I must add that I did witness some remarkable change in this hypocritic gesture of asking another girl to tie a rakhi, even if she is not your sister, even is she happens to be around. Few years back, I mismanaged my vacation-timing/place and happenned to be at a cousin sister's place during rakhi that year. But I was pleasantly shocked to find that no other girl was asked to tie me rakhi except my cousin . But anyway, I had learned how to handle such situations (you really become street-smart if you start living in a hostel (that too one like mine) since your are just 12 years old). Back then, when I didn't know, nobody helped me, rather made things worse for me!!!!!!!

The MAN

2007-12-23T17:52:00.000+05:30

Many a times I wonder who is the better of the two: Peter Keating or Howard Roark. Actually every individual (almost ALL) has traits of both the two. These are two orthogonal sets and every human being has a projection on these two axes. Unfortunately the projection on the Keating axis is much higher than on the Roark axis. And more unfortuante is that every individual would say that he/she admires Roark. Despite knowing what is that you wish/revere, people don't strive towards it but towards the easier path which just makes a hollow personality. Since the the majority is like that, Peter Keating makes much better impression than Roark, in the world.
But then, why doesn't Roark evolve and change to Keating. Because, the biggest happiness comes from within, not from appreciation/good-words from others. Hence Roarks do exist but they wonder why doesn't the world really do what it says it wants to do!!!
The world is so much used to getting impression about people by what they say about themselves, than what their actions speak for them. And this unfortunate hyprocrisy of the world, puts people who are really straightforward/honest, in unfortunate situations. But do such people care?
Yes, they do. As I said, such people do have some Keating component (a minor one, of course) also in them. That part comes because human being is afterall a social animal. Maslow's 4th level need does exist in them. And since the world really lacks Roarks, Roarks get dependent on likes of Keatings to understand, and hence appreciate them and here they yield to their human weakness :-(.

Globalisation

2007-08-26T01:49:00.000+05:30

"I am not a supporter of Globalisation", said Sven, a colleague of mine. This gave me a big food for thought!!!!!
Most of the advanced countries resort to statistics and probablity to understand/predict the behavior of the society/market and other such non-quantifiable things. We will simply follow their tradition. Not because I want to follow them but for the simple reason that they are correct here.
Isn't it more probable to find the best of brains amongst 1 billion than 200 million and much more in comparison to 8 million.
Also, isn't it more probable that more people means more capabilities, more varied interests.
Would a filthy rich country like Norway, bacause of its oil, remain so if it were to sell its oil only inside Norway?
No.
So, would Norway be worse off without globalisation or would India be. Well, if no globalisation means no trade with other countries, India would definitely be better off than Norway. But fortunately/unfortunately, its not so.
When people say No to globalisation, what they mean is no redistribution of wealth anymore, not after the polarisation of wealth occurred due to many factors, spread across past few hundred years.
I believe highly in capitalism/freedom. (Selection based on rejection criterion, there is no better option, at present). So, every country/people/individual has the right to chose the form-of-trade or economic-policy it wants.
But this works very well for already-rich nations as long as the BIG manpower nations' people are more charmed by short-term goals of geting the best in their lifetime but not concerned with longg-term goals for the nation.
For the economy to grow, recirculation of wealth is very essential, the more the cycle goes and more vigorously it runs, the more the economy grows.
If Norway and India decide to close their economy and grow with their indegenous products, who would obviously grow more and full. Of course India. with the population and size it has, and as i said, higher probability of talents, India would have much better scope.
Anyway, the law of equilibrium would make sure that there would be lots of dynamics going on, whether you hate duncan or like closed economy, things would keep moving towards the direction of equilibrium which would stop only once the whole world acts like one country with maximisation of benefit of all but of course with weightage of skill-sets taken care of.

NATURAL FEEDBACK SYSTEM in the society and its behavior

2007-08-25T10:11:00.000+05:30

Gandhi freed India. Had he not done that, wont it have happened?
It would have - just the occurrence might have got delayed.
The colonies got free. Not Sun Yat Sen, not Gandhi and nor Atlee were the essential reasons. They just expedited the inevitable.
I believe in the surprising stability of the god-made natural feedback system which is present everywhere - from tangible to intangible things.
Why does the good prevail generally and not the evil.
There is nothing like good or bad, truth and evil. Nothing is absolute.
Its only that in the feedback system, which evolved or was made by god, the reference input is the truth, the holy, the correct and its that which is good. rest all are evil and untrue and bad. so whatever are the reference inputs got defined as the virtuous words.
Hence its not the truth which prevails, but what prevails is truth coz the system is designed such.
If, in the system, some noise such as a murderer running free in a society, develops, the feedback system helps him nabbed. The whole system starts working in correcting that noise as the stable feedback system doesn't allow that as a valid ouput and hence suppresses it.
Now comes the question how does the society etc. become part of this feedback system. Maybe the original one, when created was one, but how does the new one, the new society formed, the new babies born , the new countries become part of this feedback system and help it.
I believe, again this arrangement has been made by god (or evolved). we learn about the reference inputs to these stable systems through the religion or moral-science which are gist of learnings from history percolated through teachings by the scholars.
Why does religion exist? Because of this very reason.Even if you dont agree to the above given modus-oprandi behind the stability of the system, this doesn't take much ignited brain to accept that religion controls extreme emotions of human beings.
It teaches us to follow those follow those virtuous values and hence, in my philosophy, help the system (social system) become stable by helping in the direction of reference input.
(PS: for the people who don't know about feedback systems, few minutes of googling would suffice to understand my logic)
Religion is the strongest of emotion. But strangely it doesn't teach people to go against the reference inputs (which you call as virutes, in common langauge). Why? Of course becuase the history has taught that going against those virtues has failed. The nature's stable feedback system has always proved too strong for those noise. So, the religion simply teaches us to go with them, simply to be in harmoby with mother nature's (or God's) will!!!!!!

Great Nice days of Yore

2006-11-24T20:22:00.000+05:30

I wrote an article long back on whats the lovliest thing one finds. Its elusive. its something which you dont have.
Same applies to the best days of our life!!!!!
Ask somebody if he is having the best times of his life, he would always have days of yore to recall as the best days of his life.
If not natural, its definitely most probable answer. Its quite obvious, if people get satisfied with the present, world would come to a standstill !!!!!
But y m i writing such a serious thing when serriousness is never my forte and this thing is too bland and obvious to be written.
actually this was inteneded to convey this to somebody but if one's words and actions cannot convey, I am deadsure, writing just wont :-)
Or its not so? But nothing can be done anyway, not bacause of helplessness, but for the reason that EVERYthing possible has been done :-)
Anyway, I have definitely lost the regular readers of my blog because of suddenly going so dormant. But volcano needs to erupt just once and it agian becomes a strenght to be feared!!!!
So, i hope i need to start firing again and i'll hv new readers of my blog :-)

Reserving around 10 thousand seats to improve the condition of 300million!!!!!!

2006-05-17T16:18:00.000+05:30

Isn't it the most ineffecient way for welfare of a community whihc is 300m strong!!!!!

Panchtantra

2006-03-30T11:01:00.000+05:30

If you want to explain to some kid , the for loop of programming,
give him the book "Panchtantra"!!!!!

again heard it on tv

2006-03-26T13:46:00.000+05:30

heard it on tv. its soo.... nice

dekh faansi ka yeh fanda
khauf se hai kaanpta (shivers)
uff. ke zalladon ki halat
bhi badi mushkil mein hai
sarfaroshi ki tamanna
ab humaare dil mien hai

I dont know if Bhagat Singh was the composer of it or not.

ek sher

2006-01-26T08:00:00.000+05:30

Ae kalam zara ruk ruk ke chal
bada ghazab ka muqaam aa raha hai
teri nau(kh) ke neeche
mere watan ka naam aa raha hai.

wen jelly met belly

2005-12-30T19:14:00.000+05:30

belly sucked the life out of jelly and pushed it out into another long confusing alley.
balle balle balle.

heehee haahaaahoohoo

Inversion

2005-12-28T06:35:00.000+05:30

What do you feel should be the inverse of a man!!!!!!
Is it woman?
I dont have any second opinion about futility of this proposition.
Is it a man who walks in the direction of his back, who takes a 270 degree rotation to turn right and in another side 270 to turn left?
Or is it one who walks on his head and punches with his legs.
Well,for those who think at more abstract level, it can be somebody , say notnilC lliB, who sleeps in the day and gets up at night.
Or another rM rakludneT nihcaS who thinks in reverse manner. who laughs when he is hurt and who hurts somebody who loves him (dont we already have a popular term for such Man^(-1) !!! )
At very morphological level, it can be a species with heart on the right side, lever absorbing oxygen instead of providing bile juice and lungs helping in digestion. or is totally reverse. rM nihcaS eats shit and out comes Apple!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hee hee haa haa hoo hoo.
raeY weN yppaH

Gomukh Trip

2005-10-22T16:59:00.000+05:30

Author needs to be sensitive

2005-08-31T22:42:00.000+05:30

Thanks to KJ for reminding me why am I absent from blogging for so long.
Actually I got too busy with my work at the new place that I could not find time to write. (Actually I still am)
Writing aimlessly, I find too difficult , and hence the inactivity over here.
Thus came the thought that a regular writer must be quite sensitive who finds something or other regularly to trigger his
thought process and he starts writing on it.
But then I wonder how come I wrote so many (good or bad) articles while I was free for a month when I was to move from TI
and had not yet joined Freescale.
Does it imply that sensitivity is a function of available time.
The more time you have free with you, the more sensitive you become.
But that also might not be true.
Reason:
Today I came early from office as I was somehow not in a mood to work and then decided to write something on my blog.
I took time to think what to write on and this itself , I thought, I'll write on.
And if this article turns out to be good one on completion, the above logic would prove invalid.
Spontaneity comes by itself if one puts a li'l bit of effort for something he knows he likes/good-at but not in a proper
"mood" of doing that. So, mood is the max temporal of all which is very easy to conquer but the willingness for which is very difficult
to have.
This logical discourse reminds me of the following argument of Socrates mentioned in the book "the dialogues of Plato"
The simple way Socrates proves that there is life after death is that if even a instant-born baby feels secure when it has somebody with it.
It cries when you leave it alone, it gets scared when suddenly it gets dark, it suddenly stops crying or starts laughing if it realizes that there
is somebody to take care of it.
How does it learn all these? It cannot come out of thin air. It must have learnt it somewhere before it arrived in this world. What else that
can be but pre-birth life.
Similar (Socrates must be feeling uneasy in his grave or maybe some Nth birth of his would be cursing me!!!) approach is what I am taking to
prove my point. Logic.
Anyway, I get back to what I was trying to drive the conclusion at.
One hypothesis that fits it that somebody who is always willing to write somehow makes it his profession so that he has all the time to write
can definitely make a good author.
He has the time and the will as well, so there wont be any dearth of topic he would feel like writing about.
While writing this one, the argument struck me "sensitivity is a function of time".
I think it IS so. it is function of time you have left with you after you are done with those which you had kept for yourself.
If you are too engrossed in your work/fun/entertainment/../.. you tend to become less sensitive.
(Sensitivity is a virtue or a vice, I honestly have no strong opinion about it).
Of course there is degree of it as with all the things in the world. Our sensitivity gradually declines as we move out of our
social circle. First comes immediate family then comes relatives/friends , then comes surroundings . at some very low degree comes
country and almost at NIL comes environment/world. This is what general psychology is. Maybe this is what makes revolutions so difficult to happen.
I am lost and hope other readers also get lost in this thought as there is nothing I m trying to convey but just writing aimlessly!!!!

Cheers!

I own the MOST beautiful thing (the MOST beautiful thing I own)

2005-08-01T14:59:00.000+05:30

its ibook.
G4,512MB RAM,30GB HDD.
deadly combo. that too at 57K!!!!!!
I m so happy.
urs truly is at home at 11:00 pm at night writing this posting.
DSL modem is not that disappointing afterall.

Airtel beats Apple

2005-07-26T20:46:00.000+05:30

Doesn't it sound like the giant Real Madrid being beaten by if-not-minnows but definitely not-Los galacticos, Sevilla.
Yes,
I applied for Airtel boradband connection much after my advance payment for ibook.
But ibook remains hung in mid-air somewhere (or may-be floating in high seas somewhere) while I have already got the phone installed yesternight and modem will be installed tomorrow :-(
"der aaye durusht aaye" ki ummeed karta hoon.
I went to India Gater yesternight.
It looked so good.
But I was disappointed with the adjacent BIG lawns thanks to junta's apathy.
But overall, it looks GLAMOROUS.
I am still waiting for World War III !!!!! (India Gate reminded me of it)

"You don't win a battle by dying for your country.
You win a battle by making the other son of a bitch, die for his country."

Gen Patton.

Most admired person

2005-07-15T13:25:00.000+05:30

If somebody asks me, if given the chance and info I have, which real-life character I would wish to be the most, my answer would be Napoleon.
May I know what others have as answer to this. lets keep it open to real-life characters only. maybe like one's dad or Hitler or Gen McArthur or Joan-of-Arc or ../..

two BIG companies and a hapless me :-(

2005-07-14T20:09:00.000+05:30

We, at freescale were given an offer (so were we told around 5 weeks back) from Apple guys.
Since Freescale (erstwhile Motorola Semiconductors) manufactures the G4-G5 processors used in Apple's products, the offer was of discount upto 15% for the Freescalers!!!!!
Whats better than ibook/powerbook at the price similar to that in Singapore in India!!!!
Promptly I dropped my plan to buy a notebook and wait for the offer to start!!!!!
I never thought the wait would be so long-lasting.
Who the hell could imagine two such BIG shots would be so tardy in so small a job compared to the complicated tasks they undertake and complete.
Anyway, I do some light at the end of the tunnel now as the nth enquiry I made at Apple's sales office today gave some positive result.
Will update you as soon as I get my new ibook , meybe by next month :-(

Straighforward or Blunt: a thin line

2005-07-08T10:00:00.000+05:30

Yesterday I made Ma cry.
She asked me , after a phone call from Papa, whether I was hapy having her around or unhappy.
Was her being around restricting on my freedom.
I tried to be honest and gave a straighforward answer without space for ANY emotions. Maybe I am yet to realise the importance of things which I take for granted (anybody does so, isnt it).
My blunt answer made her cry.
I always make the mistake of being blunt in trying to be honest/straighforward :-(. Only when I relaise I have crossed the thin line (generally I do), I realise my mistake. The realisation dawns upon me once the other person starts crying or has the patience to argue his/her justification in getting hurt or ....
Any suggestions to cure me of this ???

patience is a virtue

2005-06-29T09:05:00.000+05:30

Have PATIENCE. I'll be back :-)

Loveliest Thing in world

2005-06-10T22:24:00.000+05:30

Anybody knows???
I know. Anything that you dont have!!!!!!
If you are an engineer, you crave to become a prog/manager, if your are a manager, u crave u had ur own venture!!!!!
When I was kid, I used to wish to grow up fast to get rid of mom's dictatorship or didis' cheatings or teachers' punishements or poor scorecards and what not
When grown up, I miss those carefree days, those innocent times when you dont have to worry what others may think (any action of urs wud embarass ur parents maybe, but not u 4 sure) and all.
When I am not married, I miss a wife,a best friend, you share ANYthing with (though I am too open with all in this sense, but still...) and many other experiences. I am sure when I get married, I'll miss the carefree days, i'll get burdended with some added responsibilities and blah blah.
So, the loveliest thing in the world is ELUSIVE
If you have it, then your life has come to standstill. So, watch out!!!! Keep the HUNT on.
Don't become complacent/helpless, keep up the effort and enjoy (atleast try) the journey!!!!!!

on Som's suggestion

2005-06-08T08:35:00.000+05:30

I fully agree with Som (refer to his comment on my last posting) (agreeing with Som. I could never imagine that!!!!!)
When I started my blog, I intended to use it to satisfy myself of my creativity skills, as far writing is concerned and in the process, hoping that my readers would enjoy them. I feel I did acheive both through some postings.
No net connection at home and work in office dont is making it difficult to strike a balance between life of my blog and quality of my blog. I hope to set things right once I get net-connection installed at home and before that, get a laptop as well.
LORD, let there be net-connection at home!!!!!!
Anyway, I got an idea today. In the Vedic-age, we had the sections of society based on profession like kshatriya, brahman, vaishya and shudra. Names sucha Mr. A Singh, Ms S Rajak, Mrs B Vaishya or C Bhatt etc. must have come from that.
In present world, if we apply the same basis, we can expect names such as
Anand Oscillator, Abhaya Amplifier, Lokesh USB Buffer, Som Power, Sharad CRM,
Saurav Onlineadvert etc. etc.
Anyway, its just a proof that when I go back home, I have nothing else to do. No TV, no PC, NOTHING!!!!
khaali dimaag shaitaan ka.
Hail shaitaan

BirthPLACE criterion!!!!

2005-06-02T20:13:00.000+05:30

This question came to my while wondering why was I not born in the royal family of UK or why was not I destined to be Anand Walton or Gaurav Gates just by God's providence (in form of getting born here or there or where'er)!!!
Any comments?
If its related to what I do in this birth, its already too late to try to compensate by good deeds. so lemme have fun some more now (afterall I have to compensate for the next birth also!!!!)
Now if somebody says the crap as dont you feel so happy being the way you are and blah blah, blog is no place to reply to such things, atleast at presnt when I am short of time these days :D

Some posting

2005-06-02T19:22:00.000+05:30

Well, looo..ng (not actually though, just 2 days) since I posted something. Me just free enough to occassionally check the my gmail account and hence comments on my blog.
Today I got my hutch phone activated and hence could talk to my sis in Gujarat.
I today went to NDLS Rlwy Stn. to see off a cousin sis of mine who had come here (was staying at her bua's place) to take some med exam.
I was talking about her with my sis when this thing (a long unsolved mystery) cropped up again.
HOW COULD MY SIS GET THROUGH MED ENTRANCE EXAM!!!!!!!!
fortunately/unfortunately I have tutored few people and my sis was the second most dumb student I ever faced.
(Dont ask ANYthing about the dumbest. all i can say is she had dinosaur's brain in human body!!!!)
Well, back to my sis. I remember those days when I had taken my X board exams and was passing my time back home in Lohardagga (my dad was posted there then) and there was this sis preparing for Med entrance exams. Yes, sitting in Lohardagga with nobody to tutor her. For the uninitiated, its a small place where you dont expect such things as tution etc. etc.
Well, the onus to teach her physics was on me. My elder sis was not as free as I. Man!!! here was a guy a year junior to her and teaching her physics and even he (i.e. yours truly) got the impression that the girl is as dumb as she used to be when we all were kids.
Haa haa
Seriously, I remember the days when dad used to give us math quizzes and she was the undisputed trailer of we 3!!!!
Anyway, I never had the patience and ,honestly speaking, I now feel bad about the way I used to rebuke her, but it was just because I had the full confidence that she is my sis whom I love so much that such things she wont even notice to feel bad about and neither did I ever thought so much while rebuke or such thing. I , now , feel some(little) remorse.
Anyway, the DUMBO girl GOT THROUGH!!!!
And just one year she wasted!!! (I know people wasting two years or so to get through entrance exams of such professional courses)
Nobody was as much surprised by the result as I, my dad and my elder sis (in order of magnitude of surprise)
Because we had TRIED to tutor her !!!!
To cut the story short, she not only cleared the state level exam, she graduated with 2nd rank in the university!!!!
Now, if anybody is the BIGGEST fan of hers (jijaji might have been, earlier in the college, but i dont think he wud be anymore as they are happily married now), its me.
Her confidence amazes me. Not only now, even then when she had no proof to convince her younger brother that she was no dumbo, she had confidence in herself. She dropped out of one of the best Vet Colleges in India in Jabalpur, in first year itself, not listening to my mom's vehement pleas not to do so. My mom was also not unjustified as the impression she had got from my feedbacks was that she was a dumbo :-)
Anyway, now she is a doctor with amazing voice, great talent in sketching/painting, an amazing literary talent (how can I forget the days when she used to narrate to me "mangaranth kahaani" whihc went on and on and on till we both fell asleep while we were small kids) whose self-written poems were so beautiful.
She imbibed all those things of my dad except the seriousness towards studies and voice which she inherited from my mom.
I should not say so about the seriousness part now that I am convinced she has the zeal unmatched. The hard work she has put, I do know/remember/appreciate/realize that.
Hats off to you Soni didi.

What opinion would Roark have about Fountianhead?

2005-05-30T19:30:00.000+05:30

The way I have interpreted Fountainhead, I seriously doubt, he would have ever read Fountainhead if he knew apriori what does it deal with. And even if he did, I am sure he would not have changed himself even if he was different from the character protrayed.
kim vicharasi twam?
I am a stubborn fool who never finds himself wrong and thus trying to justify himself by comparing with Roark :-) kam se kam main ek besharm-honest to hoon!!!

Gurgaon Yaatra

2005-05-30T08:34:00.000+05:30

Made a trip to Gurgaon. heard a lot about . did find it exactly the way/opinion almost-all-were-unanimous-of.
Went to Jawahar's house near Shushant Lok shopping arcade.We met after a couple of years. had a nie time together with majo portion, as usual, in recalling the days spent in school and again me pestering him to reveal the identity of agaurav004. He again feigned ignorance :-(
This was a proxy id used (somebody tell me who he(it canne be she) was!!!) to chat with a good friend of mine from Science College and suddenly after a year I got a mail, on lycos, from her asking why no mail since long. I said I never mailed her, where does the this "since long" arise!!
I had hard time convincing her, after few cross questionings, that original was I and that was some impersonater.
Anyway, it was an episode, nice or sad, no comments.
Went to Millenium Plaza.Hope there is Mini Osama having his eyes on it!!!
Is delhi suited for so much glass buildings!!! I think its unnecessary wastage of power in trying to maintain AC for instead of concrete walls which would be much better insulator than glass. Civil Engineers, any comments?
Then Sahara Mall, city Center (AOE, remember), Metro Mall.
Gurgaon has grown fasss..tttt.. man!
Or was it like this earlier also. i guess not.
If junta is geting bored with my memoirs and no articles of information/substance, my apologies.
Please bear with me till I get my ibook(!!!!) and an internet connection at home.

got the cooler

2005-05-26T09:56:00.000+05:30

Got IT!!!!
yesternight.
Exhaust ,18", powerful 300W.
had a chilled/cold night :-(

HOT Night!!!!!

2005-05-25T08:07:00.000+05:30

YES!!!!!, it was one of the HOTTEST night I ever spent!!!!!! It was too HOT for me. I need to learn a lot here in Delhi!!!!!
Take my words, if you want HOT nights, come to DELHI.
(though cold (CC..C..O..OO...LLDDDD...) nights are also there sometimes)
Envious of me?
Well, I hate somebody who envy me (kam-se-kam ek to reason genuine hoye tab to jealous hoye koi, and i hate unreasonable people who can find somebody like me to be envious of!!!!! FYI, I have never found ANY yet who envies me:-( ) (Well, my list is endless. I envy Napolean, Hitler, FDR, Churchill and the list is endless. God, I am waiting for the WW3 since 1996 (The year I appeared for X).....)
.
.
.
.
.
So, to calm down those who got excited/envious: Yesternight I slept in my new house. No AC, No cooler. Thank God, it was not made HOTTER as power was there to keep the fan running. I can vaguely recall the moments few hours back, when every half an hour I changed from sleeping on back to sleeping on tummy. so comforting it was for intital few minutes till the fan evaporated the sweat on my body and then back to HOT mode for rest part of the 30 minutes before I could turn the sleeping position again.
Lesson Learnt: No procrastination. Cooler to be bought today now at any cost (hope the financial cost doesn't shoot up)

Delhi(NCR) doesn't stop surprising me

2005-05-24T08:55:00.000+05:30

While back from Delhi on my bike, to Atta,Noida, at a redlight not-so-unused-one,I saw a car wating for the light to turn green, at the edge of the turn, instead of stopping behind the Zebra Crossing. I was on the other side. There was a policeman standing by the road. I looked at him and indicated towards the car. He got a bit uncomfortable (my observation), got up to cross the road. My expectations rose, atleast some policaman does feel the need to check this frequent bad practice at delhi roads of no respect to the traffic lights.
The guy crossed the road, went towards the car AND THEN CROSSED THE OTHER SIDE AS WELL.
Me realised the hopelessness. Decided to drive the bike on delhi roads at my own risk. (whom God loves die young! I hope God doesn't love me that much) and moved forwards.
Still alive after two long drives and hence this post dedicated to GOD who saved me!!!!!!!
(FINALLY moved to the rented accommodation in 15A, Nice colony. Tomorrow footer, anybody joining???)

Found a house

2005-05-20T09:19:00.000+05:30

FINALLY
Well, I should not write FINALLY, rather finally . coz this is the second house I looked at and finalised.
EXTREMELY nice locality of Sector 15A. Nice furnished house (but on top,second floor) though just one big bedroom and one small drawing room and a kitchen and a bathroom with a common terrace (i dont think anybody from lower floors wud use it more than I).
dekhte hain bnina mehnat kiye ghar lene ka anjaam kaisa hota hai.
will get to know after staying there for a month or so, I guess.
Have a beatuful BIG green garden in the front (would help my JOG/footer/../.. anybody joining??)

experiences in delhi

2005-05-19T10:36:00.000+05:30

Having too many new experiences but running REALLY sgort of time to write.
took sauna-bath and steam bath, first time in my life. they were both really very boring and time-taking as well.
talked to a houseowner in Sector15A yesterday.Bachelor guy from Bihar looking for accommodation.
thank god the intimidation was not physically apparant in form of convulsion or soemthing!!!!
house-hunt still going on.
dont know when wud get time to unleash my creative talent of writing.
some new experience on form of protests from sme people over my blog, i dont understand y.
anybody has anything to write, please feel free to comment.
want me to remove ur link/comment-on-u/../.. write in comments and it will be done (if i agree with that!!!!)

I met some prominant television personality

2005-05-17T09:45:00.000+05:30

I was having dinner in Radisson and then came a couple in the table opposite to mine.
The lady was loking VERY gracious and the husband a simple/humble/queit fellow. Deduction based on observation.
Suddenly it occurred to me that I had seen the lady somewhere but as my wont, of forgetting things, howe'er hard I tried, I couldn't recollect.
Atleast I could realise that the lady was a television personality but then I never saw so much television, so I focussed on personalities whom one find in some regular articles' author photographs but :-( I couldn't recollect any. She was not Shobha De of course.
I have a very bad habit of getting impatient to get answers to my curiosity and more so when it looks easily solvable.
So, simplest and best thing I could do was to goto the lady and ask. Only thing was had she been somebody not-so-famous, I dont know how might she (or her husband!!!) react.
Anyway, I did the best thing and went to her. I ,matter-of-factly-and-honestly said, I thought I had seen her somewhere, maybe on television or maybe some magazine, but was not able to recollect where. If she could help me!!!!!!
She obliged and in a very graceful manner. She introduced herself as "Jaishree Arora" and very confidenyl named few serials out of which I could indetify only one "Humlog" and said she acted in more than 150 episodes (anyway, i guess it must have been a good performance by any serial THEN). Well, I didn't need autograph nor photograph(I never went to Srinath or Kumble as I could easily identify them when I saw them in Bangalore with ample opportunity to get photographed or talk or ...) but I got what I wanted and that was QUICK solution to easily-solvable curiosity of mine. I came back to my table SATISFIED!!!!!
Hey! so the celebrities DO talk in hindi amongst themselves!!!! haa haa. (though they talked to me in english. well, it was me who initiated in english :-( )

moved 2 Delhi

2005-05-16T09:36:00.000+05:30

me in not-yet-so-scorching-but-hot-enuf-4-me delhi.
will keep u posted on getting time.

If we all could just be selfish, not jealous

2005-05-07T09:44:00.000+05:30

Here follows the words of wisdom from a philosopher-to-be!!!!!
Feel free to protest through whate'er means you can :D
I have a bad habit of thinking too much when I have not much to do and not at all thinking when the some rational thought ought to be behind some action to be undertaken. Enough about the philosopher, now some on the process of enlightenment.
Of many daily-habits I had to imbibe in school, one was earliest possible visit to BOGS in the morning. If ever you missed it because of the morning hour rush with BOGS:user ratio being as low as 0.2 and all looking forward to optimising his sleep with getting up the last and make a quick trip to BOGS as only one eternal truth prevailed in the wee hours of morning and that was PT mein late na hona, warna pair,ghutna,ankle and what-not bahut dard karega Anyway only 2-3 experiences were enough for me (some people took more painful days though :-), kyon Bhadar(Abhishek Raj)? He is a testimony to that!!!!!!) and I learned it fast. Gone are PTs and frog-jumps but the habit remains. So, to put the habit to good use, I adopted the habit of thinking in this precious time. Take it form my experience, its best time to think. If you dont agree with that, atleast you can take my words that thinking is the best you can do here.
Why Napolean's genius brother Louis could not accept him the way whole world did? Why did I write the mail thus? Am I right in leaving world's 2nd/3rd largest semiconductor company for another smaller one? und so weiter.....
On a similar errand, while thinking about Fountainhead, occurred to me this Would not the whole world turn too good to live in with people retaining their selfish nature but just restraining the jealousy
So, its not asking too much as one is allowed to be selfish ( do we even know how dificult/easy it is to become selfless or how great/disappointing it feels one becoming one???). Just for an example, the way the Ambani siblings are fighting, its wont be surprising if they both lose few billions in near future. But if they stop it all and divide even with one emerging a bit better off, still in the end, both would be better off than if they keep the fight on (Are you two listening to the great prophet??? :D ). Any trade/business can be successfull if the fundamental it is based on is gain for all. Thats why businesses generate wealth, they dont siphon it off from one side to another (in general, you can definitely say so). So, one doesnt expect such behavour from so successfull (ethical? NO comments.) business family as Ambanis whrn they know (i guess so) it very well that this is loss to both but early settlement is gain for both, though not equal but still better than prolonged fight. Reason. Nothing but jealousy. One doesn't want his/her rival to become good/better. No (some, and that too only to yourself) harm thinking/wishing as long as it does not manifest in your action. If your action get influenced by this, you are losing the precious time/means/../.. you might have utilised for your own growth/peace/benefit.

(Now the author is not in mood, as he is not enjoying it much writing this. Sorry to u all)

Looking forwad to Delhi

2005-05-06T10:01:00.000+05:30

My blog seems to have taken a 360 degree turn now.
I started it with the announcement of my moving to delhi and am back to the same topic.
I dont know if this happens to everybody or just to me. Now as the days are getting closer and closer, I am getting more and more impatient. Yesterday, the impatience was bit less as Chandra didnt agree to my short-cut proposal of writing down some descriptive text files instead of a ppt/doc with detailed block diagrams. Even hard copy proposal was rejected :(. So I got busy with something. But as soon as that something got over for the day, me back to vegabondage of thoughts. Now that I cann't get any book also issued from so-nice-TI-library (I hope freescale has a nice one, lets c) as I got my login disabled there (remember No-Dues of college!!), my problem is aggravated.
Thanks to the blog, I can safely vent out my impatience, without irritating Lox by calling him up while he is busy stabilising an op-amp (which wont even take 0.01% of the die area which itself wud be as small as 4 sq mm. Com'on ,LoX, chill out), or sending some junk messages to Satyadeo who is too busy for his July release ( hope the potential indian mothers dont get inspired by these software engineers' delivery-rate!!!! yeah, maybe Germans can) or calling up a friend in Patna (if her reliance mobile allows my cell-one to connect (or vice-versa)) and doing general chit-chat till AshishL comes and reminds me if we can continue with the Technology Transfer that we stopped after 3 hours of digging of the digital-code yesterday or till Saravana messages me on yahoo chat (who said yahoo msgr in office is waste of bandwidth) if I can forward him the noise simulations results so that he can check, sitting in lab in Dallas and characterising the silicon which arrived a month back, at this ungodly hour, if the silicon matches the simulations!!!!
Thanks to the blog, people got a chance to keep off from me.

Napolean

2005-05-05T18:40:00.000+05:30

Finished the biography of Napolean today. Lieutenant at 19, Brigadier General at 24 and Emperor at 34!!!! That too nothing inherited.
And so powerful and emperor who installed proletarians as kings and generals and the whole europe accepted. Equally dramatic was his fall!!!
reason?
Emil Luwig tells its impatience. (cann't the meteoric rise be attributeed to the same reason!!!!)
Also, overconfidence in the fate and himself. But who the hell deserves to have over-confidence if not Napolean!!!!
Hail Napolean.

The day I learned swear-words

2005-04-30T11:17:00.000+05:30

Satyadeo,mere ko bhi pass karo na.. I say(trying to conceal the plea intended)
chal James, aaj isko nahin denge ssale ko. yeh le,mere ko pass kar and Satyadeo tosses the football towards James who skilfully grabs the ball, with his left foot, as soon as it lands, not a single bounce, and gives a ground pass back to Satyadeo.
Just three of us, first year (class VII) kids of twelve, playing football on a sunday afternoon on ground number 4. After the typically hectic sunday morning routine of "vishesh safaai" (cleaning of the mess,aangan,four verandahs,all the five rooms with soap and water, with water brought from the handpump sometimes!!!!!!), somehow the seniors had spared us from the "obligatory" fielding at the grounds where they played cricket (I don't remember how did this happen as a hectic day was no reason enough to get too tired to play(in any case,how could 4th yearites do a menial task and get tired and somebody else got tired or not - it was their discretion!!). Maybe there was some more serious business like some 3rd yearite might have annoyed some 4th yearite(ANY 4th yearite was no less than a GOD, except when amongst the other GODs!!!) due to some action of his and he was to be put to task or whate'er..)
So, we three (rest two - Ashutosh and Abhishek - probably preferred a quick nap) decided to make the max out of this exceptional day. Took the football from the store-room and ran, we three, to the farthest ground from the house (else who knows, some senior sends Ashu or Abhi to get us back to the house (please dont ask me "why")). Atleast that would delay our being found out!!!!!!)
Back at ground 4, my requests turn to pleas but with no results.bhag saale, hum na de rahe, muhalla ssala
I said gaali kyon de rahe ho. hum nahin gaali de rahe tab tum kyon de rahe ho
Satyadeo who had all the making of a bully-to-be says to do na gaali, humne kab mana kiya hai saale, bol saale bol. haa haa haa haa
James is in no mood to help me(there is no second thought about whom to support - me or Satyadeo).
My self-respect protests hum gaali nahin de sakte to tum gaali kyon doge. mere ko bhi bolna aa sakta hai
bol na kameene, bol na. bol to paayega nahi, siyaar ki tarah paad raha hai. sala. haa haa.
ssaala, gaali deta hai mere ko. samjhhta kya hai. hum bhi saala bol sakte hain. saala mota. kameena saala...and torrent continues
With nonplussed eyes the two look at me. Of course, never could one use swear-words inside house(No, even a senior dare not do that to a junior as there were "GODs" in each house, to look after these things),but being batchmate they very well knew this meek homesick momma's boy who was too scared to use swear-words. It was like breaking some well-inculcated religious beleif, using expletives. But finally its you who have to face the world and not those who wrote the religion or moral codes for you or who taught you those. That what must have occurred to me then(I can hardly remember now) and impulsive that I am now, I must have been more in childhood, i guess. So I didn't take much time to respond thus. My poor vocab might have played a spoilsport but it was my FIRST time afterall, I didn't miss much :-).

larynx multiplexing: Enjoy 4 songs simultaneously!!!!

2005-04-28T08:08:00.000+05:30

neela aasmaan so gaya hai
laraa...lara..laraa..lara..lalalaaa... hoo....
neela aasmaan so gaya hai

Jeeyen to jeeyen kaise bin aapke....
Jeeyen to jeeyen kaise bin aapke

Apun bola tu meri laila
Vo boli fekta hai saala

fourth larynx, as if writhing in pain, huffs out
humein toomse payaar keetnaa ee hum naheee jaanate
magarrr.. jeeee naaheeee sakate toomhaaare beena

oo.. ho..oo.., ons barse raat bheege honth tharraaye
dhadkane kuchh kehna chaahe keh nahin paaye

Lagta nahin dil kahin bin aapke

Apun jab bhi sachi bolta hai
Aye usko jhooth kaiko lagta hai re

huffing larynx keeps on trying hard,it has tried its best to indicate that its protesting.
soona gum joodaaee kaa oothaate hain loag
jaaane jindagi kaise oothaate hain loag...

The vocalist continues, trying to subdue ambient noise, with raised voice
Hawa ka geet madhyam hai,....,Hawa ka geet madhyam hai
Samay ki chaal bhi kam hai
Neela aasmaan so gayaa....

protests grows louder
Kaise kahoon bina tere zindagi ye kya hogi
Jaise koi saza koi badd-dua hogi

Ye uska style hoinga
Honthon pe na dil mein haan hoinga

the sick larynx puffs the last time, as it has realised,with so distorted lyrics, it cann't continue long
deen to yahaan pe lage........

The champion, with boosted moral, carries on, the classic song from equally classic movie SILSILA
oo.., meri baahon mein sharmate lajaate aise tum aaye
ki jaise baadlon mein chaand dheere dheere aa jaaye

Second larynx could not continue as the owner, Lokesh, carried it inside his room cursing.
(when song is not as great as the one from Silsila, how can you have the motivation to sing)
samundar kinaare le jaake re
bol de khullam khulla
(the protest seems to die down with one protestor subdued, other backed out)

Yeh tanhaayi yeh main aur tum, Yeh tanhaayi yeh main aur tum
Zameen bhi ho gayi gumsum
(no protest audible now and the beautiful song continues unmolested (unheard also. is it??)..... )

Neela aasmaan so gaya....

Thus ended the major contest of the four larynges and Anand's emerged the winner!!!!!!
He attributed the win to the strong motivation to sing he had ever since he saw the movie few days back. He has become a great silsila and neela-aasmaan-so-.. afficionado since watching the movie. The allegiance was owed to Shiara Bano and the song main-chali-main-chali-.. before Silsila could dislodge it (in the same manner as Shaira Bano dislodged Salma Hayek of Desperado fame)!!
That evening was so satifying one. Both purposes - of singing that particular song aloud and audience-presence - was achieved.

Dumbest/Laziest creature on earth

2005-04-27T19:00:00.000+05:30

It is Me.

How much perfect/accurate you can be

2005-04-26T12:16:00.000+05:30

"Time bol be" said Abhaya.
My reply "TIME'.
(In case you didn't understand (that makes me laugh. HAA HAA ) Abhaya wanted to know the time of the day)
This is something not unusual at my place. You feel so bad on becoming the target and worse on missing the advantage of something like the question above!!!!
Another instance (yesternight conversation):
Loks says, while drinking milk "doodh se hugga achhe se saaf hota hai"
My reply "to tu paani se saaf nahin karta kya?"
I must appreciate Abhaya for his skill of never missing the target. His instincts here beats even that of a leopard or a hwak or whate'er swiftest thing you can imagine of!!!!!
So, that day was so satisfying for me when I beat him at his game on his asking the time :)
Thanks to Abhaya (yes, his name is Abhaya,not Abhay and you dare not misspell for the reason now pretty obvious :-) ),we people are also getting some of those instincts :-)
One more:
majaa nahin aa raha dost says poor me.
to tum chale jaao uske paas thus saith the king, Abhaya!!!!
God anyway wont take him in heaven and if Evil is also watching him, he is not going to ever die!!!!!!!!!

Most funny Hindi movie???

2005-04-24T17:30:00.000+05:30

I am sure you all would come up with names such as Andaaz Apna Apna,Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron,Hera Pheri and many more such names.
But can you conjure up the name "Gajagamini" !!!!!
if not, then either you are amongst the elite community like profs of IISc (whom I watched the movie with, and M F Hussain, in the IISc auditorium) or have-nots who did't watch this movie. I agree Anadaz Apna Apna is a masterpiece, but that was made with that intent. Imagine(plss..., u do that, i cannt dare do that. HAA HAA HEE HEE HOO HOO) what would have happenned had MFH thought of making a comedy movie. Read on to get some idea to be able to imagine :).
With lots of excitement, I went with Lokesh to IISc, to watch the critically acclaimed (my heartfelt (rather belly-felt) thanks to the critics) movie and none else than Mr (somebody, please confer on him honorary doctorate)M F Hussain himself was to grace the occassion with his presence (and he did!!! I must appreciate his dare-devilry. Or maybe the ambience of IISc assured him of protection. He should have come to IITK :))
So, we did reach the newly built auditorium of some particular department (dont ask me which). Beautiful it was. Really the architect deserves some serious praise. It was simply grand.
Khair, we entered the auditorium, with few minutes delay (MaN, i oculd have laughed few more minutes had I reached on time :-( )
The movie had started. When I entered the DARK audi, I thought, nobody was there. But the pin-drop silence was deceptive. The audi was FULL (almost. I relaised at the end of the show. Yes I was there till the end!!!!) with the intelligentsia (the profs) and intelligentsiaayins (hee hee, their wives). When I reached there, the Bollywood king, SRK was on the screen (but he could not set the screen on fire as it was TOO bright with colors (no doubt, it was) all around already) and so was the queen Madhuri Dixit. The blunder I committed was I was expecting a movie with some protagonist or some storyline or some message or SOMEthing. Man, it had NOthing. Thanks to my blunder, it helped me enjoy the movie a hell lot!!!!!
How?
Well, for few minutes, maybe 15-20, I tried my best, initially with my left brain(the logical one) and then the right (artistic one) to be able to follow what was going on - SRK and MD conversing in verses (or was it simple style? I was totally in awe of everything going on there and in awe of the audience enduring it with silence), few (actually LOT) naked children running around, some background music and something something...
I felt bad,feeling similar to reproach for not understanding the creation, the artist was trying to express(remember my posting on booker winner GOST!!!)
But with the entrance of Kavi Kalidas and then Samrat Akbar in the same scene, dawned upon me the realisation of truth.dont apply brains, stupid. this is CRAP. HAVE FUN. All hell broke loose inside my belly and I ran out of the audi, came out and had one of the most hearty laugh in my life. I laughed loudly, clutching my stomach,to the utmost surprise of the security guard standing outside. I had never laughed like that before. It was atleast 5 minutes before I went back to the sanctum sanctorum. Again the same calm, but I was at ease this time, not in awe, coz the truth had dawned upon me. I thoroughtly enjoyed the remaining part of the movie with clutched-mouth laughter.
Finally, to my regret, the movie ends. The host announces - Mr MFH is open to any questions people have. Please feel free to ak.
To top it up, my uncontrolled laughter, a professor stands up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I got a jolt, my whole body protested. Somehow Lokesh's hard pinch worked (and obviously my self-control) and I could manage with a whiff.
MaN, if he could realised what he missed (he should have followed my actions) in his endeavour to follow the movie....
But MFH made my day (I am sorry for the audience which couldn't appreciate the movie and tried to understand it!!!!)

Can love be so strong? Is that love??

2005-04-23T16:14:00.000+05:30

Excerpts of a chat with a very good friend of mine(She happens to be a distant relative of mine)
I ask: When are you going to Patna?
Reply: Dont know. Mom has asked me not to come.
Me says: Well.Have patience. Its so nice to know that you are willing to patch up and ready to goto your home in Patna.
Reply: Yeah, I am. Lets see. I waited so long but nobody relented. I hoped they would soften as time heals all, but .....

This is a case of love-affair not acceptable to the bride's(or girl) family. She waits and waits and waits, hoping that her family would relent and then she would marry the guy in a traditional way its done in any typical indian family and at the end, everybody would be happy. But that had not to be. The reason, as I know - different castes.
I can fully understand any family's initial reservations against marriages amongst different castes/community/../..
The simple logic being its easier to adjust if the pair are from as similar background as possible. Obviously you would agree that if you have spouse 20 years your junior/senior, there would stark differenc in the way of thinkings of both, priorities,reaction etc. etc. Now since you cann't have it all similar(please, keep queit, those who are thinking in a skewed manner), soceity put criterions like religion. Maybe people found even in religion, different sects/community have different way of life, therefrom came caste as a criterion, i guess, for marriages. This is totally understandable.
(The way Ayn Rand didn't compromise when it came to expressing her philosophy through John Galt's speech in Atlas Shrugged, this is going to be loo..ng baby!!!! but then, the speech WAS loo..ng, wasn't it.)
Similarly when parents looks for a match for their son/daughter, they look at the age,studies etc. etc. other than religion/caste etc. (In fact, caste (i wont say religion) atleast has got a backseat in priorties, with time) (there are things like gotras blah blah which i m not too much aware of. Mom are u??? ). But all said and done, what do they do when suddenly their baby(!!!) of 20 odd years has decided to marry somebody who they would have never ever included in list of probable matches for him!!!
To any conflict, the simplest (I would say ONLY also) approach is dialogue.
In ANY family, its done when such situation arises.
The why does situation as above arise???
I am not at all in a position to answer. Neither my experience nor my studies make me capable of that.
I have seen another case, similar, quite closely.
My second jijaji is a punjabbi munda. Obviously(isn't it?) my parents didnt go all the way to Patiala and found a match for my dear sis. They decided after a few years of friendship in college, that they will marry each other. I remember, when I and my mom went to meet my to-be-jija. I was in 2nd year of undergrad then. I think my mom did talk to my didi suggesting dropping such plans many times and so did I. Whatfor?? I dont know. I guess, just b'coz that was my first natural reaction to her deciding such thing on her own, without consulting mom and dad. My mom had reasons - Punjab would be too.. far ,we dont know about those people, the culture would be so different, the language,..,.. . But maybe 2-3 years of friendship was enough for them to decide on taking this plunge and overcoming such trifles. Fine, mian biwi raaji, to kya karega kaazi. We all (not that my jijaji's side were very welcoming to the idea of having a bihari bahu from so different background) agreed to the pair's decision finally and now its as good as any marriage.
But not that I advocate this thing that parents should relent. I have a subtle point to make.
Couldn't my didi or the girl-in-chat agree to their parents wishes? Was it that difficult for them to understand that their parents would definitely find a more suited match for them than they themselves can. In my didi's case, fine, nothing was being compromised. My parents never put a clause - either we or he.But when it comes to compromising one to get other, what does one do? Do you break relation of 20 years to go for some relation 4-5 years old. Or do you do vice versa.
I put the above two examples to raise the issue/question. They dont indicate the type of cases I am to discuss or my recommendations.This is to open-ended thing to pass any verdict on. But lets carry on.
I never fell in love , but based on examples I see in daily life, I have observed (not the right word as who the hell has time/inclination to observe such a thing!!! rather i feel) that based on few days of acquaintance/friendship, you decide he/she is your love. Is that enough. Cann't it be phoney? Again mind u, me dont have experience. Are you as smart/dumb/dirty/../../ as in your daily life, when you are with a person of opposite sex whom you got infatuated-with/attracted-to based on the looks/smartness/../..(similar initial traits) or do you pretend. If you dont pretend, nothing beats that. perfect. but if you do, i guess, you are inviting trouble.
(I dont think Freud saw all the dreams to write interpretations of dreams, nor would have Maslow reached the last level of need and then gave his theory of five levles of need. So lemme write .....)
So, you got attracted (based on baseless things (with respect to commitment such as love/marriage) and then you try your best by looking good, nice talks, nice gifts etc. etc.to keep the affairs continuing. Generally as far as meeting few hours a day (who the hell are the lovers in this world having so much time.I am sure, none) it works. So, you become lovebirds and definitely few yearsof romance is enough to decide the compatibility. Looks and dress-sense wont last long and you get to know each other well enough. Then why the hell very few affairs break. The simple reason is that the way any husband wife apply effort to let the marriage life sail smoothly, so do the lovebirds (in fact they need to do less as its not marriage afterall).So, if you are doing that, isnt it as good as early marriage without parents' feedback/counsel. I would rather have people trying so many love-affairs before settling for a marriage.
(I dont need to mention that aspect of sex is totally kept out of this logical discourse, which is not fully justified, but, as i said, lemme write.... )
So, if what I said is correct, then wat follows is that after 3-4 years of love affairs, you ask your parents permission for marriage with him/her and then when they say its infatuation/not-so-thought-up decision, you feel they are being unfair. How can they say its not wise/thought-up etc. when it has continued for so long. But what you miss out is that they have their own experience (of their own marriage as well others' relatives/friends etc. etc. as to what it needs to build a successfull marriage and they want you to gain from that as they would want the best for you.
But that doesn't mean arranged marriage beats love marriage anytime. Love marriage is the best if its the one I am suggesting , tried and tested :).
The advantage love-marriage has over the arranged one is that you know the person much better and dont have to base the impression on one meeting (which can be phoney also!!) as in arranged one but then in arranged one, you give proper thought if the other person is going to be compatible with me for whole life or not, while in love, you dont think of compatibility-for-life for sure when you fall in love initially and generally the love culminates in marriage, so you know where the flaw is.
Actually my simple question, I meant to ask was, is love so sacred as we watch in movies generally or it can be one which is matter of not simply heart, but of brain as well. Think-and-then-fall-in-love types!!!!! And be open to suggestions and when thing as marriage is concerned, don't look at your love as only option, talk to him/her about the future compatibility, adjustments and all the things you might never have discussed earlier, before jumping for thing as great as marriage and then decide. If things look fine, no need, as the other side you have uncharted waters while here you have something you know much better. If not, dont stick to love just for reason as commitment(keep that for marraige :) ).There are many more things which you realise if you are open to listen. Dont blindfold yourself. I somehow feel, love is not so sacred, but one doesn't try at all.
What do you say about "Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam"???
(Of course you have to stop somewhere!!!! Let it be once you get married :-) )
The way you love your parents the max, just for the sheer coincidence that you were born to them, but both u and your parents know/feel/../.. mutual love has to be there, so it grows to such a great extent. Similarly, thats what happens in any successfull marriage, you know love has to be there and both grow it and it works. Love is developed and you have to work on it which one can do easily if he/she wishes.

bakwaas bakwaas PJs PJs

2005-04-21T18:31:00.000+05:30

This is what happens. Quality goes down if you dont constantly innovate but stick to some bakwaas commitment of delivering.
Want to see an example of the consequences. Here it is:

When I C the moon I C U
When I C the stars I C U
When I C the Sea I C U
Get out of the way you are blocking my view

Tumko dekha to ek khyal aaya
Tumko dekha to ek khyal aaya
Tumhari saheli ko dekha to doosra khyal aaya!!

He is so short, when it rains he is always the last one to know.

THE FIVE SECRETS OF A PERFECT RELATIONSHIP:

1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home, cooks good, cleans up and has a job.

2 It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh & she is cute.

3. It's important to have a woman whom you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.

4. It's important to have a woman who is good in romance and who likes to be with you.

5. It's very, very important that these four women don't know each other.

Most people are only alive
because it is illegal to shoot them.

My apologies to all

I have got @IDs

2005-04-20T18:34:00.000+05:30

I have made it a point to post something on my blog daily (and I'll honour this commitment with all sincerity till it breaks!!!! :-) )
So, here it is, an impromptu one.
What did u guess? Its not going to be revelation like that of Arthur Ashe or Magic Johnson.
Its just that I was wondering if generaly junta have as many email ids or a few poor souls like me only have. I started with mailcity (other than the email address we were provided with in college). Got the id I asked for (y not, afterall I am talking of the time way back in august,1998)agaurav. Then few months later,I came to know something about yahoo chat. Let there be agaurav@yahoo.com. But if I beat that "agaurav" in catching hold of the same id in mailcity, he beat me here in yahoo. I didnt know at that time that the general protocol , jo "badde" log follow karte hain, is name.surname for ids. So, what does poor me do. Appends 009 (My school roll number) to agaurav and I got it. Thankfully there was not much rush for james bond style ids. Then followed hotmail, again for chat reasons. again agaurav009 worked. Then there appears indiatimes.com, a website as steamy (rather much more) as its parent newspaper's page3. To browse thorugh its picture gallery , one needed indiatimes id. Thanks to IITK cybercafe (err... sorry, I mean Computer Centre), again same id was created for indiatimes. It was put to maximum use!!!!
After so many ids, managing them bacame a task. Finally I decided on ignoring all other and remaining loyal to mailcity which had id representing my identity and no crossbreed of Anand Gaurav(agaurav) and James Bond(009(forget 007)). Things went on fine till mailcity sold itself to lycos ( differently said, lycos bought mailcity). I had to fan out mails to everybody that my id has changed to agaurav@lycos.com.
So far so good. Some years later, comes the announcement from yahoo about it increasing the space for each user from 10MB to 100MB. Out poor old lycos stuck (still stuck!!!!!) to 5MB. My loyalty got a shake (20X improvement!!) and with no remorse, me moved to yahoo and again fanned out mail about the switch. Barely few months and comes gmail with a novel idea and 1GB space!!!!! The novel-idea about the way of its expansion and craze for it was more of a reason than the space and I somehow got an invitation from a friend of mine and thence yours truly has his 100% loyalty to gmail as agaurav009@gmail.com
Lets seee who beats gmail and pulls me to its side.
So, now you know I have got @IDs

antyaakshhari of hindi poems!!!!!

2005-04-19T15:50:00.000+05:30

ragini hoon main tumhaare kanth ki
goonjati jhhankaar ban jo vishwa mein
kalpana hoon main tumhaare swapna ki
ho rahi saakaar saari srishti mein

tum bano rituraj to main kokila
tum kokila to main tumhaari kook hoon
tum hriday to main tumhaari vedna
tum vedna to main tumhaari hook hoon

kaun tum mere tumhaari kaun main
yah adhoora swapna hi rah jaayega
tum vahi jo main kahoon to haani kya
prashna hi uttar swayam ban jaayega

Promptly another guy form the opposite team stands up and recites another poem in hindi starting from the hindi alphabet "ga".
He is over and without a seocond's delay (bare minimum delay required for decency/discipline) the first team again recited with the last alphabet this guy ended his poem with i.e. "ja"

jeth ho ki ho poos, humaare krishakon ko aaraam nahin
chhothe kabhi sung bailon ka, aisa koi yaam nahin

mukh mein jeebh, shakti bhuj mein jeevan mein sukh ka naam nahin
vasan kahaan? sookhi roti bhi milti donon shaam nahin

bailon ke yeh bandhu varsha bhar kya jaane kaise jeete hain
bandhi jeebh, aankhe vishann gum khaa shayad aanso peete hain

par shishu ka kya, seekh na paaya abhi jo aansoo peena
choos choos sukha stan maa ka, so jaata ro vilay nagina

vivash dekhti ma, anchal se nanhi jaan tarap ur jaati
apna rakt pila deti yadi phatati aaj vajra ki chhati

kabra kabra mein abudh baalakon ki bhookhi haddi roti hai
"doodh doodh" ki kadam kadam par saari raat sada hoti hai

"doodh doodh" o vats! mandiron mein bahre paashaan yahaan hain
"doodh doodh" taare bolo in bachhon ke bhagwaan kahaan hain

"doodh doodh" duniya soti hai, laaoon doodh kahaan kis ghar se
"doodh doodh" he dev gagan ke, kuchh boond tapka ambar se

One doesn't realise the value of something unless and until he/she misses it.
One of the BIGGEST laments in my life is we dont have ANY recording of the annual antyaakshhari competition we used to have in our school. What a class it was!!!!
Each and every guy was so much passionate about it. Every guy had many more poems by heart than movie songs.You need to witness it to realise what elated experience it is.
(If junta is willing I can work hard enough to put some in my blog)
I could never be a part of this revered team. Not even at section level could I get in, what to say of class level teams :-(. Despite the fact that there were only 25 ppl in each secion(four sections in each class of 100) and each team had around 10 ppl, still I managed to slip into the majority of 15. This is something I still feel bad/sorry/apologetic about.
Once section level competition, in each class,got over, there used to be inter-class competition. Once it comes to class level, you have everything at stake. Afterall its prestige issue of the whole batch!!!
I remember my two most momentous years as far as antyakshhari is concerned. 1994 and 1995.
1994,when my batch(3rd year) defeated the immediate senior batch in a CHARGED assembly hall (only to be thrashed by the mighty 5th yearites,who had defeated thier seniors last year, in finals). But man! what a feeling it was,to humiliate the immediate seniors.!!!! (Nothing gave more satisfaction than that, in school!!!!)
1995. Everybody expected the 4th year (my batch) to win the final as they had defeated the same team last year. But the judges had some different plans. Some new rules suddenly made at 11th (rather say 12th) hour and we lost. I still remember Chandu completing it with

haar jaana meri aadat mein na tha na rahega
har gum ko sehne ki bhi had hoti hai .....

I still miss those golden days!!!!!

Aa bail mujhe kulhaari maar

2005-04-18T12:40:00.000+05:30

Sounds similar but yet unheard?
Well, yours truly devised this idiom while unsuccessfully trying to recall another popular idiom. So now you know, if you know hindi, its a crossbreed of aa bail mujhhe maar and apne paanv par kulhaari maarna!!!!!
So, u relaise the force is also doubled. It conveys the samething with much more impact than the original two similar idioms. Look at the power of permutation/combination. U can also make apne bail par kulhaari maarna. If you dont find the fun, try visualising and still if you dont laugh, use Nitrous Oxide, as nothing else can help!!!!!
Now, since I beleive in free sharing, you can use it wihout violating any copyright acts. Feel free to use it :)
It reminds me of a similar incident. In my batch in school (class VII to X), we had a GENIUS in hindi, Chandrashekar (he won state level open-for-all hindi competition when he was in school!!!! Mind u, bihar is hindi speaking state with, i guess, many MAs,PhDs in hindi) , whom I could confuse with this skill of mine and that too in hindi!!! I have always had trouble learning by heart ANYthing and hindi was hell of a torture when you lack this skill. I was trying to recall a "doha" from Kabirdas. All I could recollect was this
karat karat abhyaas karat, pundit bhaya na koi
dhai aakhar prem ka, parhe so pundit hoye
I found something fishy (yes, I could find something, thought not wat, was wrong) in this recollection of mine and the time to get into the exam hall was getting quite close. Obviously, who better but Chandu.
The guy also gets perplexed!!!!! Yes, I still feel proud of me over this incident. HAA HAA.
AFter a few minutes of head-scratching, in his distinct style he said
SSAALE,*#@$ *%$#,....,.....,KUTTE exam ke time confuse karta hai
(Ours was a residential school and so *#@$ *%$# were a norm)
For the uninitiated, the original "dohas" whose crossbreeding I orchestrated were
karat karat abhyaas karat, jarmati hota sujaan
rasri aawat jaat te, sil par parat nisaan
and
pothi parhi parhi jag mua, pundit bhaya na koye
dhaai aakhar prem ka parhe so pundit hoye

I passed the X exams and the biggest motivation was thence I wont have to study Hindi and English (I never said my command in english was ANYbit better than that in hindi!!!!!!).
But I do miss those gr8 moments of school when there were much bigger issues like ........ than trifles like poor marks etc.
well, wait for next post......

PS: My another school mate corrected me on reading the blog and he said it was
((15:31:07)dream_***:hum log sab the wahan ...ab kisko click kiya tha yaad nahin ...but perplexed to sab ho gaye the tere genius pane se

mala ferat yug bhaya,pandit bhaya na koy
dhaai aakhar prem ka, parhe so pundit hoye
which was hybrid of the second one (pundit waala) written above and
maala ferat yug bhaya,mita na man ka feer
kar ka manka daari de,man ka manka feer

DIDNT I TELL YOU, I am quite FORGETGUL!!!!

World history/politics: Some nice books

2005-04-16T11:11:00.000+05:30

The book Exodus by Leon Uris gave a very much Schwarzenegger ( FYI, i googled to get the spelling!!) movie kind of impresssion about the Israeli heroes who fought for asserting their independence (not for winning it!!!). I thought it must be exaggerated as Leon Uris is no Collins and Lapierrie. He writes fictions. What the book did it that it made me buy the only documentary left by my favourite pair of authors, Dominique Lapierrie and Larry Collins and that was O Jerusalem .
Is Paris Burning is a marvel.
Thats what I thought, but till then I had not read ANY of the other books authored by these two. With so lucid description of WW2 history, and in particular, France's occupation by Nazis for 4 years, it immensely helped my knowledge of WW2 and history in general and most importantly introduced me to two brilliant authors.
City of Joy is a joy to read. Again the beautiful description. The BEST thing I like about them is they give you just facts but how to make that interesting is something our journalists should learn (definitely Durga Das was there).
Similarly Freedom at Midnight for those who want to know some detailed story behind Indian Independence struggle and who missed that b'coz he/she didn't like the boring history classes( I liked them though. not the class, but the books).
But NOTHING beats O Jerusalem and I bet my blog on it. Do read it. Authors have done marvellous job and so have the characters in the book. One cann't help wondering if whats all written is true. Read it to feel it. Us has definitely helped Israel a lot but it wont hv done what David Ben Gurion, Golda Meir, Moshe Dayan and the innumerable others who went into oblivion of history did for their own country. I hope we indians could learn from them.
On the indian politics side, i might have not read many, but the best has been India from Curzon to Nehru by Durga Das. The ex-editor of Hindustan Times has written a gem of a book in the form of this piece. Its not the general newspaper stuff but from the journalist who witnessed many things form quite close range. The epilogue covers some period of Indira Gandhi also. People of our generation should read it. If we want India to shine, we need to know our own history (not the medieval or ancient, but the modern politics and all that which has shaped the things of present) to have a better future.
Comments eagerly awaited to improve my blog and my choice of articles. Being an engineer, I know the importance of feedback very well.

(PS:my recommendations are highlighted)

Am I mistaken or booker winners are generally CRAP???

2005-04-15T17:46:00.000+05:30

First booker prize winner I read was God of Small Things. I read it till end just because it was a booker prize winner.
I got bored.
Fine. Maybe thats the way intellectuals think. I still remember how bored I got reading Fountainhead when I was around 12, but read it though, as it was kept there at home and I was available with not much to do during the summer vacations. Later when I read it, when I was in XI, I realised what a classic it is. Similarly, I assumed I have yet to get matured enough to understand this book GOST(!!!sounds scary? well it IS.). My dad(i think i should write papa. ok frm next posts. FYI, he likes communist ideology) made me all the more think so as he had liked the book a lot and I, then(wat bout now!!!!!!), used to feel he is much more matured than I.
Khair, before jumping to any strong conclusion such as the title above, I thought lemme give try to the Booker of Bookers winner,The Midnight Children. MAN!!! whata a book it was. Each and every page till the 100th one was read by me just for the reason that it was supposedly GR8 work of literature. Then comes The Moor's Last Sigh by the same author. Again left incomplete. It would have been so good on author's part had he left it incomplete instead of readers like me ditching the book without finishing them. Then comes the strong verdict in sucha gross form of generalisation as the title!!! What the heck, if people whose work the whole world waits eagerly to read can write such craps, cannt i write crappier and that too on MY own blog . Haa haa.
Suitable Boy was good and as you all know it didn't even get nominated for Booker Prize!!!!
So, now you know if you wanna win Booker, make sure you get it reviewed by me. If I liked it, drop the idea!!!!!!
Enough of criticism. Lemme now give some tips.
You wanna enjoy reading, that too classics, read ANY Nobel Prize winner. I can generalise on basis of two novels ( Sholokov's And Queit Flows the Don and Solzhenitsyn's Cancer Ward ). I would recommend authors like Tolstoy,Dostoyevsky,Gorky to everybody. They are too good. Beware of Dostoyevsky though!!!
Will come up with some more recommendations though not literature this time, in my next posting. Happy Waiting

A beautiful Translation

2005-04-14T18:55:00.000+05:30

I am quite free today (my first post gives enough hint why so). So, I am letting my (is it so, or just plagiarism?) creative juices flow. I rmember the wonderful translation of very famous lines from Rober Frost, I learned in my school (watta place it was, Netarhat)

gehan saghan manmohak vantaru
mujhhko aaj bulaate hain
kintu kiye jo waade maine
yaad mujhe aa jaate hain
abhi kahaan araam badaan
yah mook nimantran chhalna hai
abhi to mujhko milon
milon mujhko chalna hai

Great Generals

2005-04-14T17:08:00.000+05:30

"You don't win a battle by dying for your country.
You win a battle by making the other son of a bitch, die for his country."

What a statement. It definitely bowled me over.
An intelligent statement from the great General Patton (of the Patton Tank fame).
Sometimes I wonder who the gretaest of all was. Rommel,Patton,McArthur,Eisenhower,Montgomery!!!!!!
So many greats were there. But is it the generals or soldiers like Vasilli who make them great?

Finally moving to Delhi

2005-04-14T15:16:00.000+05:30

Finally, after trying my best for 3 years to adapt to life in bangalore with no social activity and only football that too on saturday mornings, I decided to call it a day. I am moving to Freescale,Noida from TI,Bangalore in a month's time.
Being an analog IC Design Engineer has its own constraints of not finding too many options in India. Khair, thankfully this situation cann't go worse from present and I am sure its going to improve.
First thing I need to do is get a footer team formed close to my place so that regular saturday play can go uninterrupted :-). Anybody interested do let me know.