Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Expectations

'Rules are for the guidance of wise men and the obedience of fools'
Douglas Bader (google the name to know about this legend)
So are the popular quotations from holy scriptures or great men.
Its said, 'neki kar aur dariya mein daal'. I'll rather say 'jo-man-aaye-so-kar and dariya mein daal'. Since you already use the word 'neki' the whole essence of the quote is already lost. So, if you use it with the word 'neki' in mind, rather don't do it.
But what happens is that when you do it, you do it with love as you think the people you do it for, appreciate it and will remember it. (Just a extrapolation of the expectations of it is that ,in return, you desire, they will also start loving you in the same way you love them). And, its very understandable to expect reciprocation. Even a mother won't keep loving her child the way she does if she is never able to see the effervescent smile of a baby(can anybody check out this psychological experiment!!!!)
But, it does hurt a lot if that reciprocation is not received. (In my postings, long back, I wrote that whate'er happens to you, its because of you, nobody else). So, how do you save yourself from this very general problem.
Simply, stop 'neki kar and dariya mein daal' and simply do whate'er pleases you.
As I already emphasized Douglas Bader's quote, 'following your desires' is for those 'intelligent' people (who are not going to follow those desires which can destroy them). So, if it pleases to help somebody, help him/her but if it doesn't please you, simply don't do it. If it pleases you to love somebody, do it.
But then, who doesn't want to be loved by those whom you love. Then what do you do. With the realisation that it was all your desire to love those people whom you did, you won't feel (that) bad if its not reciprocated. Sounds inhuman. Maybe, but somehow God is there to keep the humanity preserved. He (almost) make sure, sometime or other, few people do come into your life who are able to penetrate your 'cold' heart and generate in you, a strong desire to be loved by them and most importantly, they also love you!!!!

2 comments:

  1. well,life, for everyone, would get very simple if expectations appear only in dictionaries, but guess thats practically not possible. mera boss bhi mujhe bolta hai ki, he has high expectations..!!:D agar professionally yeh haal hai, to personal life mein obviously kaafi expectations hote hain..!!

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  2. Well..blessed are the souls who go to bed without a sense of guilt or carrying a set of expectations. Sounds like personifying God , but keeps one happiest :)
    Rest itni gappe haanki hain aapse hai on the topic ki nothing much is left to comment. Isliye kehte hain kum phone kiya karo ;)

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